Long Time Ago`

I am hovering at about shrub height.

All I see is lush green. Out of the ground rises a transparent cloud composed of the elements of matter. When I enter this cloud, it condenses enough to take on a shape suitable to interact with the surrounding. She is Earth, and she offers some of her matter.

Who am I? Irrelevant. I enjoy this. Sensing this interface causes attraction, something about She, I found attractive.

This shape I took on is a synthesis of our attributes and qualities. This shape is Me. It is made of the same matter as She; otherwise, Me could not touch She, and She could not see and touch Me.

Since Me is made of matter, it has weight. Me has three stick-like legs to stand on and walk with. Me’s body is of lesser density than She, and it changes shape into what is needed. Mainly it forms long flexible arms to pick up food.

Eating: a somewhat befumbling concept, breaking Earth’s matter into smaller bits and releasing energy. Interesting. Why binding it together in the first place, why at all? Why using up energy?

She likes making complex structures, taking smaller bits and attach them to each other with energy. Why would She receive fun out this activity? One cannot continue building things forever. There is an end to it. At some point in time, one runs out of matter and energy.

Time. Interesting.

She attracting I and instigating the forming of Me has the purpose of having something that breaks up the complexity in subtle ways.

The cycle of creation and destruction was in place before Me existed. She used to break the structures She had built on a large scale.  Then She had to start again from the very beginning. The start of creation is tedious, making trees and butterflies is fun.

That’s why She attracted I and formed Me to bring life into the manifested Me. Me promotes the same cycle but in a more subtle way. Me destructures structures less vehemently, more targeted and contained.

Me’s incentive for doing things is comfort and pleasure, which She provides rewards when Me acts according to She’s commands. Me can only sense through being of She’s matter. Me has learned the relationship between cause and effect.

Me is a complex structure.


I remember, before Me was formed, I was in unstructured space. I observed structures of matter move. Did I move or did one stand still? In reference to what? It does not matter. Movement in relation to each other provides an opportunity to approach each other.

I saw a red marble. It felt attractive, I was attracted. No mind, no thought, no question. There was a relationship, and movement closed the distance. Size was/is matterless.

Now, I am Me, here. Me is tiny in comparison with She. There is only little movement of Me in relationship to Earth.


Trees grow and dissolve. Me does not. There are many trees, but  Me has not met another Me, there is one Me.  What is the purpose of growing when it ends with dissolving? Incessantly, She wants to shape complex structures, She’s purpose is to create, regardlessly, relentlessly. What is She’s motivation?

Insensitivity? Interesting.

All is cyclic. Why is it not stable? Me is stable as long as Me wants. What is the reason for cyclicity, what is its purpose?

I participate in this cyclicity as Me. I am not Me. Me is mostly of She.  I think, and I am.


Long time past passed. There are countless Me. I am I, who are they? I watch them grow, like trees, grow and fall. Me is tired and entered the cycle, experiences growth and beginning to wither.


Today, I saw and felt I; separate from Me. Me as part of the Earth’s cycle and I, separate from it.


Amadeus W.

18 August 2016
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